Wednesday, January 12, 2011

You know the old "guy in a boat in a storm asking God to help him" story? The moral of the story is that we need to trust God while we take action. Super!
I am being impatient. It's not pretty. I'm really trying to talk myself out of it every day. Sometimes it works. Others it doesn't. I guess that's normal. But I'd really, really like to be perfect.
I could really go for some chocolate cake right now. Sorry, just a side note.
I feel unsettled. Discontent. Dispassionate. Bored. (Fat-this one is ridiculous, I know).
But not always. Sometimes I feel directed. Loved. Protected. Valuable. Beautiful.
Mostly, though, it's the former. God's always doing this to me when I put something before Him. He IS jealous for me. Sheesh! No, I'm glad. It's just painful and annoying sometimes! Does He do this to other people? I mean really, I feel like I'm singled out a lot of the time.
Okay, so onto the fun stuff:
I got back on Match.com about a month ago. Met a boy, he made a good 1st impression, then a questionable impression, then I asked his intention and stated mine and he said we're on the same wavelength. He's out of the country until the end of the month, so we'll see if he makes good. I've met a couple of nice guys on Match but I think I want to meet people the old fashioned way. The online thing just doesn't feel good. I feel some pressure (from myself) to put myself on every possible avenue toward finding a date worth keeping so I guess I felt like I should be on Match and since I am really working on acting from my core self (where Jesus resides), I decided that I can find a date worth keeping with or without Match.com. Here's what I'm chewing on: God is sovereign...He knows my heart, my desires, and my future. He has a wonderful man chosen for me. My job is to follow His direction, explore my passions, and meet lots of new people. And as I'm doing those things, grow, think, and act with integrity.
That's all for now, folks. How are you feeling? Content, discontent, passionate, dispassionate, bored, excited?

2 comments:

nancygrayce said...

I think that feeling is VERY normal! We all want to hurry whatever process we in.

Dena said...

i am SOOOOO feeling that way - now i need a boy update!